Thank you, @MittRomney, for being such a great, #magicunderwear-wearing dick!
I don’t usually get political on this site, mainly because it’s not called “Atheist Political Asshole”, but also because, well, politics isn’t always relevant to atheism.
(This may be a bit of a nonsensical rant, so please be patient.)
I left the Democratic party in ’04 after a lifetime of near-undying loyalty (which I can’t fully explain beyond parental indoctrination) because, with W’s colossal fuck-ups, the donkeys still managed to be colossal pussies and lose the election. I’ve since learned that it’s usually very difficult to unseat an incumbent president, but at that point, I was just pissed.
- I was pissed when Kerry wouldn’t take a public stand against homophobia.
- I was pissed when Kerry didn’t immediately deal with that whole bullshit swift boat hogwash.
- I was pissed that Kerry seemed to react rather than act.
(I have a point.)
And when election night was done, so was I. I was sick and tired of the Dems seemingly taking votes like mine for granted. (Interestingly enough, since then, I’ve received Republican solicitations–which is awesome because in their attempt to gain one’s vote, they’re honest about their policies since they assume you’re a ultra-right-wing whack job–but not a single Democrat one.) I figured they’d have to bray to get it back (get it? “bray” rhymes with “pray”?).
Then Obama showed up.
At first, I was like everyone else. No way in fuck was America EVER gonna elect a black president, especially when the Democrat base was so fiercely loyal to the Clinton machine.
I was wrong.
So ’08 went down and all was joy. When the current race began, I paid the Republicans little mind. They were offering up clowns like Michelle “pray the gay away”‘ Bachmann, Rick “pray for rain” Perry, and Rick “JFK makes me wanna puke” Santorum. I knew none of those pug-fucks had no chance on the national stage. When Bachmann won that straw poll, all I was thinking was “go ahead, hand the bitch more rope.”
Then the loons dropped out. The insanity whittled and watered down. At some point, I knew Romney was the choice. But then what was delightful was that even diehard Republicans were talking shit about him. Like when Palin gave him her less-than-enthusiastic endorsement. When Gingrich called him a liar. Ha!
(I swear I have a point.)
And then, perhaps due to necessity, they all got behind him and pretended to be excited. And the polls started to reflect that. Then Obama said he was for gay marriage. And the Republicans couldn’t do that because, shit, hating gays is part of their platform.
Then Obama tanked in his first debate. Then he didn’t in his second. Maybe he wouldn’t lose?
(Here’s my point:)
Last night, I finished filling out my ballot. For the first time in a very long time, I was proud to do it. Yes, California will almost certainly go blue. And LA county will almost certainly do the same. But in a time when it’s still somewhat socially acceptable to act like denying rights to any of our population based solely on religious convictions is good, maybe Obama didn’t always do the greatest job, maybe he should’ve been this, should’ve been that, but right now, what’s important to me is rights. And when one candidate believes in magic underwear, that it’s okay that the LDS church was publicly against blacks serving in their silly organization right up until the late ’70s, that it was okay for his silly organization to almost single-handedly finance an out-of-state campaign to limit rights to millions of Californians, and the other candidate yes, may be a Christian, but not only does none of those things, but in fact publicly supports or represents the opposite, my choice is clear.
I have performed my civic duty.
I have voted for Barack Obama.