Archive for Star Trek

“I can see through time!”–#LisaSimpson

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on September 19, 2014 by Anton A. Hill

So I got really, really high the other week. This is very rare for me. I’ve only smoked about five times ever. I’ve only gotten high, where I noticed it, twice. The first time was forever ago when I was an intern at a production company in Hollywood. And it was intense. But nowhere near this.

I was at a friend’s for dinner. He had the whole setup. The bong, the joints, the crackers. I don’t do bongs. Not since the first time. I hate the whole process around it, mainly because I’m pyrophobic, so the very notion of turning a lighter upside down and holding it on while I toke sounds awful and dangerous.

I had never smoked a joint. It was awkward. I’ve done cigars and e-cigs and that’s easy. But I got two good drags. I felt pretty much nothing.

Seconds later, my friend busts out the crackers. They seemed perfectly harmless. I ate five. Tasted just like Cheez-Its. I felt nothing again. My friend warned me that though I was not currently feeling it, goddamn would I.

Goddamn did I.

You know all those stories you heard in college, usually from your roommate, about feeling paranoid while high? You know how you thought those were all horseshit? That he, and others, were either being really hyperbolic or just lying through their teeth?

You were wrong.

Within moments of my Uber cab picking me up, I was convinced that my driver was going to murder me and make a lampshade out of my skin. I’m not kidding at all. Except about the lampshade part. I was so afraid of him killing me that I didn’t text my other half to tell her I was afraid because I was afraid he’d notice my texting and kill me.

For about 20 agonizing minutes, I had to repeat to myself that no, he was not gonna murder me, I didn’t recognize where we were because it was a route I didn’t normally take by bus or by car, everything was gonna be fine, and calm the fuck down.

Didn’t work.

Even as I exited the guy’s truck, l was sure he was gonna kill me. It wasn’t till I got inside and closed the door that I relaxed. But that wasn’t the end.

Oh, no.

Within minutes of arriving home and warning the better half that I was high, the shit kicked in. Full throttle. All the way.

For hours my short-term memory was completely blasted and I could not tell what was real, and the difference between what I was saying in my head vs. out loud.

It was so Memento.

I remember literally (yes, literally) sitting there talking to my wife and I couldn’t remember whether what I’d just told her I actually just told her or I just thought I’d told her.

At one point, she suggested I try to distract myself by watching a TNG episode on my iPhone. The next thing I knew, I was holding my iPhone for some reason. I heard her laugh and couldn’t remember telling a joke.


In my racing mind, I had all kinds of thoughts. Some pretty crazy. Which I won’t retell here. The point is, though, I honestly couldn’t tell whether I was just thinking them or saying them. But I couldn’t ask that because that would sound crazy.

I finally came up with a system. I deduced that if, in the immediate past, I’d done or said something truly offensive or dangerous, then in whatever given moment, I’d be experiencing the consequences of those actions. Therefore, the fact that I was not experiencing any negative consequences (other than the wife laughing at me), I could reasonably assume I’d not done or said anything truly awful.


I couldn’t remember this full process from one moment to the next so I had to come up with a single word that I could just repeat which would convey to me, in those passing and forgotten moments, everything I needed to know.


I repeated this to myself over and over. I reminded myself that no matter what fear I had presently, the fact was that were it worthy, “calm” wouldn’t be applicable, and yet that’s what was being repeated.


I soon calmed. And once calmed, I could focus a bit more. And here’s the point of this post. I admitted to the wife that I honestly couldn’t tell what was real or not. Whatever natural separator we have in our brains wasn’t functioning in me.

This led me to wonder, for weeks now, how do we tell what’s real or not? I assume there’s some switch somewhere. Some chemical. Some neuron. Something which, somehow, tells us, “This is real. This is not.”

This is what I found.

I find this fascinating because the religious often make claims of plausibility and possibility, often of miracle-claims or general god-claims. I find these debates useless because many of the standards most of us use aren’t truly objective. So then it gets down to what the individual finds plausible based on his own standards. And individuals believe some pretty kooky shit.

As unpleasant as some aspects of the above experience were, I actually look forward to future crackers.


Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 29, 2014 by Anton A. Hill

Now that several fans/friends have already commented on this hangout on its YouTube page, I’m finally getting to posting it here. The longest one so far, ours was a great hangout covering lots of Moore background, our mostly mutual feelings on the Great Atheist Schism ™, the Godless Revival/Sunday Assembly split, what makes a great dramatic situation, and so much more!

A new leaf. Or something. Or other. (insert: #FtBullies #adhominem)

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , on August 30, 2013 by Anton A. Hill

As even the most casual reader will notice, I don’t post that often anymore. Maybe once a week at the most and lately those have been the amazing, new vlogs. There’s a reason for the lack-of posting. Well, maybe two. One is a simple lack of time. With job stuff and marriage stuff and creative stuff and game stuff and, dare I say, social stuff, even finding five minutes to drop a thought on whatever seems to simply not have happened.

And I’ve felt frustrated by this. In the good ol’ days of ’09, I was talking about shit all the time and much of that was substantive inasmuch as it was about big issues that were popping up in the news and whatnot.

I realized recently that one of the biggest reasons for the difference is that in ’09 I wasn’t working nearly as much. I had time!

But that’s not all.

I don’t know about other writer/bloggers, but I’ve often felt an internal pressure to only publish posts that I feel will rock the world’s socks off. No, not completely. I mean, honestly, I don’t think I’ve written about much that I’d realistically expect to have that effect. But the intention had been not to post unless I felt it had some meat to it. Like an article!

Then it dawned on me the other day. The etymology of the whole thing! "Blog" is a truncation (possibly a better word for it) for "web log" which is just a log one keeps on the web.

Anybody remember Star Trek? I sure do. Remember how during the teaser of most episodes and after every commercial break there was a log? Obviously, for story purposes, the commercial-break ones were to fill the uninitiated audience who’d just tuned in to the pertinent information as to what was going on. But on a deeper (no, not really) level, they were just logs, updates, of the mundanity that had gone down. No waxing philosophical on feminism or the moral implications of Flying Spaghetti Monsters (tag whoring!), but rather simple updates.

That was it!

So with that remembering, I realized to satisfy my frustration, and during the lulls in which I’m working on more substantive issues, I can just fucking talk (er, write)! So here’s my first attempt at doing just that. I promise nothing, but what I’ll try to do is just blab in short or long posts about whatever (in atheism) happens to be rattling around in my noggin on whatever day I happen to feel like sharing.

Oh, and I plan an overhaul of the My Media section too.

My video “atheism|IS A RELIGION!” is live on #AtheistConnect!

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 22, 2012 by Anton A. Hill

The video is here. The main page is here.

I did this bit a long time ago, but never got around to posting it here. It’s brief and a traditional response to the traditional assertion that atheism is just another religion. In case anyone’s wondering why it’s not also live on Support Atheism, as of this writing, they’re moving servers and updating, so have a whole backlog of material (mine and others’) that they have yet to post. Once that happens, I’ll continue to announce it here.

Thank you, #DanSavage, for calling the #Bible on its bullshit!

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , on May 8, 2012 by Anton A. Hill

It’s a damn good thing this isn’t called “Atheist News Asshole” (though I do contribute to Atheist News) because I always take days or sometimes weeks to get to the big stuff. Let’s start with the essentials, from The Young Turks:

And now some more in-depth insight, courtesy of Zinnia Jones:

And before we go any further, let’s be really clear on what a “bully” is, per


N. a blustering, quarrelsome, overbearing person who habitually badgers and intimidates smaller or weaker people.

V. (with object) to act the bully toward; intimidate; domineer.

V. (without object) to be loudly arrogant and overbearing.

A bully is someone who isn’t nice to someone else for whatever reason, and it tends to be a physical not-nice, though it can be
verbal/emotional. What I don’t get is, how was Savage “bullying” the students?

Let’s pretend he was. Continue reading

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